January 2012
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I think Selene > Black Widow.
I can't decide:
section9:
If my current case of the Receivers is worse than my current case of the Me’s.
Of if the two are interfering with each other to the point that I can’t satisfy either.
oi.
Dayum. Sorry, dude.
I’m totally not creeping/stalking on FB this hottie bartender/server from yesterday.
Not. At. All.
I dont know why this is so funny
appledontfallfarfromthetree:
LOL
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PAGING TLOTH
texnessa:
there’s a seating at a certain restaurant saturday night so READ YOUR EMAIL STAT and we need a fourth
*le sigh*
Bios Blow
palmtreepalmtree:
Have to write a first-person bio for my summer job. Kind of want to kill myself.
I have decided that the following are pretty much the worst things to have to write ever:
Job application cover letter
College application essay/Personal statement
Personal bio - first person/third person; short/long; whatever
Wedding toast
Eulogy
These are the ugly runts of the writing...
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Good morning,Tumblr.
Good night, Tumblr.
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She was wonderful.
Lunch, then a date with Kate Beckinsale.
See y’all!
Having now considered it, (thanks, TLOTH) I assume the Grinch is a grower, and not a show-er.
Fair Trade Agreements
palmtreepalmtree:
It has recently come to my attention that my roommate has a phobia about taking out the trash. It’s something to do with our “weird” and “pasty” neighbors watching her.
Tonight we struck a deal that I would take out the trash and she would do the dishes.
I’m pretty certain that I made the better deal.
She’s pretty certain that she made the better deal.
Thus, it is...
Good morning, Tumblr.
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Good night, Tumblr.
HUMP NIGHT!
The jury's still out but...
womaninterrupted:
kenikila:
An orgasm may have helped cure my headache. A little blood flow and all…!
“Honey, I have a headache. Can you help me out?”
Reminds me of that joke where the guys asks the girl if she wants her aspirin orally or suppository-ly.
whiskeywithwater:
blackcharityrackham:
I just heard Rihanna describe herself as a “rockstar”. I laughed so hard I almost fell of my chair.
Some people need a good reality slap.
I think Chris Brown beat reality to it
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Just spoke with four employees of the USDC,...
Y’all got some funny accents.
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For TLOTH and her Friend:
Edna: It will be bold! Dramatic!
Bob: Yeah!
Edna: Heroic!
Bob: Yeah. Something classic, like, like Dynaguy. Oh, he had a great look! Oh, the cape and the boots...
Edna: [throws a wadded ball of paper at Bob's head] No capes!
Bob: Isn't that my decision?
Edna: Do you remember Thunderhead? Tall, storm powers? Nice man, good with kids.
Bob: Listen, E...
Edna: November 15th of '58! All was well, another day saved, when... his cape snagged on a missile fin!
Bob: Thunderhead was not the brightest bulb...
Edna: Stratogale! April 23rd, '57! Cape caught in a jet turbine!
Bob: E, you can't generalize about these things...
Edna: Metaman, express elevator! Dynaguy, snagged on takeoff! Splashdown, sucked into a vortex!
Edna: [shouts] No capes!
Money says Sawyer will have to apologize to James... →
kindasavvy:
Dianne Sawyer pissed off our local weatherman. He’s fuming mad.
She’s stupid. Big deal. He doesn’t need to cry or debate about it. #losingmyloveforJamesSpann
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Good morning, Tumblr.
Hump day!
Have a good night, Tumblr.
TT
womaninterrupted:
Was just told that I smell “soft and vanilla-y.” You heard it here first.
I would kind of have (kind of have?) expected garlicy and/or gochujangy (or owever you spell that)…not that I’d have minded!
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